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Thursday, April 09, 2009

What's in a Name?

In the current economic crisis, some employers are choosing to bestow upon their workers fancy new job titles in lieu of a raise. Check out this Top 20 list from the Telegraph:
  1. Beverage Dissemination Officer – Barman
  2. Colour Distribution Technician – Painter & Decorator
  3. Customer Experience Enhancement Consultant – Shop Assistant
  4. Domestic Technician – Housewife
  5. Education Centre Nourishment Consultant – Dinner Lady
  6. Highway Environmental Hygienist – Road Sweeper
  7. Field Nourishment Consultant – Waitress
  8. Five a Day Collection Operative – Fruit Picker
  9. Front Line Customer Support Facilitator – Call Centre Worker
  10. Gastronomical Hygiene Technician – Dish Washer
  11. Mass Production Engineer – Factory Worker
  12. Media Distribution Officer – Paper Boy
  13. Mobile Sustenance Facilitator – Burger Van Worker
  14. Mortar Logistics Engineer – Labourer
  15. Petroleum Transfer Engineer – Petrol Station Assistant
  16. Recycling Operative – Bin Man
  17. Sanitation Consultant – Toilet Cleaner
  18. Coin Facilitation Engineer – Toll Booth Collector
  19. Transparency Enhancement Facilitator – Window Cleaner
  20. Vehicle Restoration Engineer – Panel Beater
I have a hard time believing that the title of "media distribution officer" would have garnered me more respect back when I delivered papers. If that paper didn't make it all the way to the front porch, I was just the %$&*#@! paper boy.

1 comment:

Lee R. Shelton, III said...

Those were the fun years, huh son?

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