Healthy seaweed that tastes like bacon: The perfect food?

Researchers at Oregon State University have created and patented a new seaweed.

Uh-huh. Sooooo...what's the big deal?

It just so happens that what looks like translucent red lettuce tastes like bacon when you fry it. It's easy to grow, and it has twice the nutritional value of kale. It's full of vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, protein...

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever. You say it tastes like bacon?

New app lets you wake up to the sizzle and smell of bacon

Instead of waking up to some annoying ringtone, why not install a smartphone app that lets you wake up to the heavenly sizzle and smell of bacon? From the Oscar Mayer Institute for the Advancement of Bacon comes the next generation of alarm clocks:

Wake Up & Smell The Bacon is a simple alarm clock app that starts your morning with the mouthwatering sound of Oscar Mayer bacon. Rotate the skillet to select your wake-up time, then get ready for a bacon awakening beyond your wildest imagination. The app connects with the Oscar Mayer Wake Up & Smell The Bacon scent device, turning your phone into a bacon-scented alarm clock.

You can apply for your chance to get a device by taking a short quiz.

(via Mashable)

The Ron Swanson low-carb diet

Ron Swanson at his classiest:

Study: Eating bacon may help you live longer

A recent study suggests that higher amounts of Vitamin B3, or niacin, in one's diet may prolong life. And bacon is chock-full of niacin. From geekosystem.com:

Energy Metabolism Prof. Michael Ristow and his team decided to feed roundworms a bunch of niacin, and discovered that the new element in the worms' diet saw them living one-tenth longer than their Vitamin B3-free peers. This evidence is surprising to the science community, because niacin promotes the formation of "free radicals," which have long been theorized to actually cause aging in organisms.

Ristow's findings go against the largely accepted theory that food rich in antioxidants can prevent aging by eliminating free radicals. "The claim that intake of antioxidants, especially in tablet form, promotes any aspect of human health lacks scientific support," said Ristow. Instead, the Zurich scientists posits that "[c]ells can cope well with oxidative stress and neutralise it."

Basically, Ristow is suggesting that niacin is perfect for every couch potato who hates fruit. "Niacin tricks the body into believing that it is exercising – even when this is not the case," said Ristow. Next up for Ristow's team is testing the theory on mice.

I have been trying for many years to trick my body into thinking it was exercising. Who knew the answer was to just eat more bacon?

Replace your usual Super Bowl snacks with bacon

For many health-conscious folks who want to cut out unnecessary carbs and avoid the problems associated with a diet high in grains and processed foods, the "paleo diet" is the way to go. The bad news: such a diet doesn't allow much room for the usual Super Bowl snack fare. The good news: those foods can be replaced with bacon!

Amy Kubal, a registered and licensed Dietitian, provides this handy comparison chart to show you the bacon equivalent of your favorite game day foods:

It's finally here! Bacon-flavored coffee!

Whoever said America can't compete with the rest of the world? Where else could you get something like this?

Eileen Gannon of Des Moines, Iowa, was awarded $10,000 in the Seattle's Best Coffee's Red Cup Showdown with what was hailed as the most "imaginative drink in America." Her winning concoction: pumpkin pie-spiced, bacon-flavored coffee.


You won't find it at Starbucks. This taste sensation will only be featured at participating Seattle's Best Coffee locations across North America.

An elderly meat-lover's dilemma

Actually, there is no dilemma. The choice is obvious.

(via I Waste So Much Time)

The perfect cure for whatever ails you

Rub some bacon on it.

From the minds of Rhett and Link. Pre-order your t-shirt here.

Using cured pork to cure nosebleeds

Glanzmann thrombasthenia is a rare genetic platelet disorder that impairs the clotting of blood. Uncontrollable nosebleeds are common for people suffering from this disorder and can be deadly if left untreated. Fortunately, a rather unorthodox treatment may offer some relief.

According to a recent medical study, stuffing strips of cured pork into the nasal cavities may stop incessant nosebleeds. The study focused on a four-year-old child diagnosed with Glanzmann thrombasthenia who received the cured pork treatment for two life-threatening nosebleeds. The result:

Cured salted pork crafted as a nasal tampon and packed within the nasal vaults successfully stopped nasal hemorrhage promptly, effectively, and without sequelae. In both applications, the patient had complete cessation of nasal bleeding within 24 hours, and was discharged within 72 hours after treatment.

The authors of the study acknowledge there is a long tradition of using pork to treat nosebleeds. Just be sure to always check with your doctor before shoving raw bacon up your nose.

Bacon-flavored candy canes

What better way to get into the holiday spirit than to combine everyone's favorite Christmas candy with everyone's favorite meat? Order your bacon-flavored candy canes today!


(via Now That's Nifty)

Mac and cheese pie...in a bacon crust

More, please!

(via Dude Foods)

Bacon cologne

Is it real? Yes.

Product Description:

bacōn Classic is designed for men and women. A common question, does this fragrance really smell like bacon? The answer is yes & no. Our Classic formula is a sophisticated spicy maple fragrance with just a hint of bacon and the fun… is in finding it. This artisanal Classic formula is lovingly crafted with the pure essential oil blend of bergamot, orange, lime, grapefruit, black pepper, cedar wood, vetiver, guaiacwood and two pinches of Bacon salty goodness. What on earth could you be waiting for? Available while supplies last.

Also available: bacōn Gold, if a sizzling citrus aroma is more your style.

Bacon inhaler

From the guys who brought you Bacon Lip Balm and Bacon-Flavored Mmmvelopes comes "the next quantum leap in bacon technology":

We call it BaconAir™, and it's a revolutionary new product that combines the deliciousness of bacon with the unrivaled health benefits of 95% pure Himalayan oxygen. Some of the benefits include:

Convenient and Easy to Use

Bacon Enters Bloodstream in Seconds

No Negative Pork Side Effects

No Calories, Fat or Stimulants

Non-Prescription ~ Recreational Use Only

Maximum Deliciousness

Really. Why breathe boring, flavorless air when you can breathe bacon-flavored air?

(via Now That's Nifty)

Introducing bacon-flavored soda

Come on. You knew it was only a matter of time:

When you're too lazy to make bacon, why not pop a bottle and just drink bacon instead?

J&D Foods, a company that specializes in all things bacon -- including bacon-flavored envelopes and the bacon Kevin Bacon sculpture that made headlines recently -- has taken the obsession one step further by coming up with a new drinkable pork product: bacon-flavored soda.

That's right, Coca-Cola is out, and swine soda is in.

J&D Foods owner Justin Esch told AOL News that his company recently partnered with Jones Soda to create a special-edition bacon-flavored drink just in time for the holidays.

Emeril Was Right: Pork Fat Rules!

Could bacon grease be the fountain of youth? CNN wanted to know. One commenter, "okbob," writes:

My grandfather ate pork at every meal starting with bacon in the morning and fried in lard pork chops all his life. It finally killed him at the age of 92. My wife and I are close to 70, in good health and love our meat. I'm not knocking the veggies because we eat lots of greens but meat has been getting a bad rap ever since Disney started cartooning.

"Anecdotal? Sure," the article concludes. "But until Dr. Sanjay Gupta tells us otherwise, we're chugging bacon fat smoothies for breakfast, lunch, dinner and every last snack attack."

Only in America

From AFP:

US restaurant serves up burger to die for

A restaurant in the south-western US state of Arizona that proudly admits to trying to finish off its customers has introduced a new item on its menu - the "quadruple bypass burger".

The burger at the Heart Attack Grill restaurant is stacked with four beef patties, cheese, onions, tomatoes and fried bacon and weighs in at 8,000 calories - more than three times what the human body needs in one day.

Patrons who have no appetite for the quadruple bypass burger can opt for the triple or double bypass.

John Basso opened the restaurant 10 months ago.

"It's not good for one's health, but it's only a joke," he said.

Customers who have room for more can also order French fries "fried in pure lard" and can purchase cigarettes off the menu.

As a courtesy, the restaurant offers its "best customers" a wheelchair service to their cars by waitresses dressed in slinky nurses' outfits.

The idea, however, has not gone down well with the Arizona State Board of Nursing. The board has expressed concern that some patrons may confuse the waitresses with real nurses.

To avoid any confusion, Mr Basso has posted a long message on his restaurant website saying that his employees in no way are medical professionals.

He says his ultimate goal is to open a restaurant in France.

"I am dreaming of opening a restaurant in Paris," he said.

Uh, yes. I'll take one Quadruple Bypass Burger and a large order of Flatliner Fries. Does the value meal include the Lipitor shake and the angioplasty? Great! Can I get that to go?